i refused to.

after all
i learn to refuse all the subject 
that intend to help me
in so much various help
because i already make myself forgot
about how it is nice to have someone that
able to accept you wholly
and not to judge you by your past
because what had from our past
is not what we want before.

i trust too much
i give too much also
until i forget on how much i didn't put myself back on the track.

maybe i was too late for showing who i am
and maybe they was too small to understand what i am.

i always refused to be always big in front of people.
nowadays
because i afraid that when i stop in giving they will leaving me behind.

and when i refused to entertain them
they will always just walk away. 

so i refused to have it anymore in my life.